an unexpected lesson on the road

I haven't felt lead to blog in over 6 months. I just didn't have the heart or inspiration. Yet we just returned from a 12 day, over 4,000 mile road trip and something happened along the road that I felt the Lord leading me to write it down. We went to San Jose, California for Benji's Grandmother's memorial and burial service. It was a very touching time with extended family that has made a lasting impact on our lives. We wanted to drive out, partly to honor his grandmother, Kathryn Van Diest. She loved being with family and valued making memories. Our plan was that on the way back home from California, we would stop at the Grand Canyon for a few hours. I have always wanted to see the Grand Canyon for myself, having heard so much about it from others who have visited. But something unexpected happened along the way.

I heard from God.

Not an audible voice, but an impression so strong that it overwhelmed and humbled me and blew me away.

It happened on the way to the Grand Canyon. We left Victorville, California on Saturday morning, excited to drive into Arizona and ultimately, the Grand Canyon. As we got closer to our hotel, I started noticing the landscape all around us. I had expected the hot desert with canyons all around. The route we took was heavily forested, cold, windy and hilly. After we checked into our hotel in Williams, AZ, we began the 58 mile journey to the canyon. The road was 56 miles that looked exactly like the picture above. Forest all around. Absolutely no indication that there was the most majestic canyon in the world, just ahead.

We were tired. It was late in the day. The road was tedious and felt like we would never arrive. I started to wonder if it was worth it. Isaiah was cranky. We were hungry. About halfway I felt a serious impression by the Holy Spirit, saying,

"This is like your faith journey, my daughter."

Wait. What?

Then it suddenly dawned on me how true that was. I had heard many stories about the Grand Canyon from people who had been there already. I had seen countless pictures. I had watched videos. I believed that it was real. I just hadn't experienced it for myself yet. God hadn't revealed himself to me in that way yet.

We've been on the adoption road for over 2 years now. Just on the road. It doesn't feel like we are going anywhere. We've heard the stories, seen the photos, watched the videos, filled out the paperwork. We have no doubt that God wants us on this road at this time. At times we get weary, sad and tired and even doubt if it will even happen.

We had to have faith to continue down the road to the canyon, even though there was absolutely no indication that it was even there. We had to have faith to press on, even though we were tired and doubting if it was worth it.

Boy, was it worth it! God revealed himself in a mighty and personal way to me that day. In a way I desperately needed. As we parked the car and walked past the visitors center, we still couldn't tell that the Grand Canyon was even there. But then finally, as we rounded a bend, there it was! So completely majestic, beautiful, immense and overwhelming that it hurt to look at it. Yet, we couldn't tear our eyes away from God's incredible beauty displayed in his awesome Creation. It was so incredible and terribly dangerous and raw and powerful. Words and photos can hardly scratch the surface of it's true nature and beauty.

Our faith journeys are like that, aren't they? Almost always, the roads that God leads us down don't usually look like what we expect. They are usually harder that we think. There are times of doubt and trouble. There are times we wonder if this road will end or finish well. I don't think I adequately can put into words what God pressed on my heart that day. I praise your name, Lord Jesus. Thank you for carrying us on the road when we are weary. Thank you for sending messages of joy and hope and words of encouragement to keep on pressing on. Thank you for the promise that there will be a day when we will round the last bend and enter into your glorious presence and never doubt your goodness and perfect plan again. I thank God that all of Benji's grandparents and all of my grandparents are experiencing that to the fullest right now, in heaven.

"Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God's will. Then you will receive all that he has promised."
Hebrews 10:36

"For the earth is the Lord's, and everything in it."
1 Corinthians 10:26